Grief is a NATURAL response to any significant change in a relationship to a person, place, item, memory, and attachment that has been removed or taken.

• Loss of a loved one –whether anticipated or otherwise.

  • death, divorce, breakups, ruptured friendships, pets

• Financial losses

  • Job

  • Housing

  • Bankruptcies

• Loss of health

  • Chronic illnesses/disabilities & infertility.

• Loss of expectations in your personal and professional life

  • Loss of sense of “normalcy” after a natural disaster –pandemic.

    • Not getting that promotion/recognition at work; not getting married at a “certain time” in your life etc.

Remember, these are just a few examples, and not a comprehensive list.

• Emotional Distance: Grieving individuals may withdraw emotionally, finding it challenging to engage fully with others due to their own emotional turmoil.

• Communication Breakdown: Grief can affect communication patterns, leading to misunderstandings, increased conflict, or difficulty expressing feelings and needs.

• Changed Roles: The loss of a loved one can alter family dynamics or roles within relationships, creating uncertainty or stress about new responsibilities.

• Support Needs: Grieving individuals may seek different types or levels of support from their loved ones, which can strain relationships if these needs aren't understood or met.

• Loss of Shared Activities: Grief can disrupt shared routines or activities, leading to a sense of loss in the relationship and challenges in finding new ways to connect.

• Impact on Intimacy: Grief may affect physical and emotional intimacy, as individuals navigate their own emotions and reactions to loss.

• Different Grieving Styles: Each person may grieve differently, leading to misunderstandings or conflicts about how grief should be expressed or managed within the relationship.

The duration of therapy for grief can vary widely depending on individual circumstances, including the nature of the loss, personal coping mechanisms, and the level of support available outside therapy. Generally, therapy for grief is considered short-term, often spanning several months.

However, the timeline is highly individualized. Some people may find relief and significant progress in a few sessions focused on immediate coping strategies and processing emotions. Others may benefit from longer-term therapy to address complex grief reactions, unresolved emotions, or deeper psychological issues related to the loss.

Ultimately, the duration of therapy depends on your unique needs, goals, and progress in navigating through grief and rebuilding your life. I will work collaboratively with you to determine the most effective treatment plan and adjust the duration of therapy as necessary to support your healing journey.

Attachment-Based Grief Therapy integrates principles from attachment theory into the process of grieving and healing from loss. It focuses on understanding how our early attachment experiences influence our grief reactions and aims to provide a secure base for exploring and processing emotions related to loss.

Children don't show their grief the same way as adults do, and it indeed depends on the age of the child and the child's cognitive capacity.

Children around the age of 6-7 may show lots of anger and aggression towards caregivers, siblings and peer instead of verbalizing their heartache. Some children may also experience bed-wetting as well.

If a child you love has recently experienced grief, it's important to support them based on their developmental capacities.

Grief doesn’t completely go away, but it changes over time. In the beginning, it can feel overwhelming and all-consuming, like it will never let up. As time passes, the intensity may soften with the right amount of support and acknowledgment, and you may start to find ways to carry the loss differently. Instead of “getting over it,” grief becomes something you learn to live with—integrating it into your life while also making room for joy and meaning again. It’s not about forgetting the person or the loss but about finding a way forward while still honoring what you’ve lost.

Grief impacts your body in profound ways. You might notice physical symptoms like:

• Fatigue: Feeling exhausted even after rest.

• Sleep disruptions: Difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep, or wanting to sleep too much.

• Appetite changes: Eating more or less than usual.

• Aches and pains: Headaches, muscle tension, or stomach issues.

• Immune suppression: Feeling sick more often as your body processes stress.

Grief activates the stress response in your body, releasing hormones like cortisol, which can affect your energy, digestion, and overall health. These physical reactions are normal, but they can feel disorienting, especially when paired with emotional pain.

Remember to take care of your body while grieving—through rest, nourishment, gentle movement, and support—this can help you cope with these effects over time.

Grief and trauma are deeply connected but not exactly the same. Grief is a natural response to loss, while trauma is a reaction to an event that overwhelms your ability to cope, often making you feel unsafe or helpless. That said, grief can feel like trauma, especially if the loss was sudden, unexpected, or tied to a traumatic event like an accident, violence, or disaster.

For example:

• Losing someone in a way that feels shocking or out of your control might lead to both grief and trauma.

• Re-living the moment of loss, avoiding reminders, or feeling stuck in the pain could indicate trauma layered into your grief.

Even "normal" grief can feel overwhelming, but when it crosses into trauma, it can affect your nervous system in deeper ways—causing symptoms like hyper-vigilance, flashbacks, or emotional numbness.

The good news is that both grief and trauma can be processed and healed. Support, like grief or trauma therapy can help untangle the two and provide relief for both the emotional and physical impacts.

Grief hurts so much because it touches the deepest parts of what it means to be human—our attachment, our sense of meaning, and the significance we find in our relationships.

Attachment

Attachment is the emotional bond we form with those we love, and it’s at the core of why loss feels so devastating. These bonds give us a sense of safety, stability, and connection. When someone we’re attached to is gone, it disrupts this foundation, leaving us feeling untethered and lost. Our brain, wired for connection, perceives the loss as a threat to survival, triggering emotional and physical pain. This is why grief can feel like your heart is breaking or your body is aching—it’s love and attachment searching for a way to reconnect.

Meaning

We often find meaning and purpose in our relationships, so losing someone can shake the foundation of how we see ourselves and the world. You may question the fairness of life, your role without that person, or even your beliefs. This search for meaning in the face of loss can feel overwhelming, especially when the loss seems senseless or unexpected.

Significance

The significance of someone in your life is what makes the loss so profound. Whether they were a parent, partner, child, or friend, their presence shaped your identity, daily life, and sense of belonging. When they’re gone, it can feel like a piece of yourself is missing, and the routines or milestones that gave your life structure now feel empty. The deeper their significance, the deeper the pain of their absence.

Grief hurts because it reflects the depth of the love, meaning, and importance that the lost person held in your life. While the pain is intense, it’s also a testament to the value of the connection you shared. Over time, finding ways to honor that attachment, redefine meaning, and rebuild significance can help the pain soften—even if it never fully disappears.